A reversal of roles

23.05.2010

The gap year seem to be a pinnacle moment in the process of becoming more independent, both as a traveller and adult, and one of the most life-changing periods in leaving adolescence and development into adulthood. The memories shared, experiences lived through, food and drink tasted and activities undertaken are some of the most daring and exorbitant ever chosen in one’s life. A great time both before and after university, it is one of life’s most essential and well-populated trips, an awesome excuse for a good time and a definite advantage of today’s relatively footloose culture, a happy advance from our parents’ childhoods.

In some ways, it seems unfair that we have these opportunities which many of our parents could not afford. Perhaps that is one of the greatest reasons why increasingly, more parents and senior citizens are embarking on a similar journey of their lifetime once they have saved enough to retire and have seen their children through university. As a postgraduate student, I have found myself a child of parents who have recently decided to take their gap year and this last year has been a startling and bittersweet experience, especially as I am still waiting for my opportunity and funds to take a similar journey.

Whilst I have been pouring over my books, living in the library and slowly progressing in my writing, my parents have been living it up in East Asia. Occasionally on my way out to lectures, I have found a postcard from exotic places such as Vientiane (Lao PDR), Macau (China region) or Penang (Malaysia). Every so often, I steal an opportunity to check my emails and find photos in my inbox of my father eating donkey, my mother hang-gliding or my parents lazing around on a slow boat up the Mekong. As I venture out to talk with my supervisor, I miss a skype call from my parents wanting to relay their time with a Burmese monk, a top official in the Chinese government or a Singaporean comedian.

It seems strange that my parents who have always been relatively conservative in their choice of holidays have changed so dramatically and are so thoroughly enjoying their travels that they have decided to extend their trip for another year and have taken jobs in Shanghai, even though both have officially retired. I constantly wonder what they will be doing next, where they are in the world at any specific moment or what souvenirs they will bring home on their next ‘sojourn’ to see their children. Gifts have already included a whole dried squid, a tapestry hand-painted by peasants from a remote village in Tibet and a marble stamp with my name engraved in both Chinese and English.

I am glad that they are both having a fantastic time and finally having the chance to relax after an incredibly hectic thirty years of hard work. Though I sometimes wonder if I could put my studies off for a short time and go and join them on their adventurous tours of the world or whether that would be really too odd – travelling with my retired parents on a shoe-string and staying in budget hostels together